why i am drinking an alcoholic beverage at 0430

because last night, the patient in bed 11 had breath that smelled exactly the same as the (digitally removed) poo of the patient in bed 10.

and those were two of my first patients.

it didn't get any better in the 12 hours I was there.

p.s. no, you don't get a numbing shot before you get your iv. this is the ER! and if you 1) know that such numbing even exists and 2) ask for it and then bitch at me when I tell you "no," chances are, you are not having an emergency.